Friday, May 6, 2011

Another Day, Another Post

I know I posted once already today, but, hey, more for you, right?

I've got a little less than an hour before I have to be anywhere right now, so I'm just going to type until then.  This is what I used to do when I would send email to myself.  I think of it as a type of writing practice.  I really wanted to get a soda, but I forgot before I got to a computer station.  I don't really feel comfortable leaving my things out in the open, nor a computer free.  They get taken quickly if you're not careful, you know.  Also, so do your things.

I suppose I could tell you a witty story of my childhood, or a memory from recently, but honestly, my memory only goes back about as far as I've been posting, as far as accuracy goes, and I'm fairly certain you all won't care too much.  I think the oldest story I have given you, and will give you, is my failed attempt at relationships in the year of my 17th birthday.  Spring birthdays confuse the crap out of me, and I have one, so if you ever see me refer to myself as an age that doesn't match up to what I've told you previously, it's because I have a sucky memory and a spring birthday.

I'd gotten to the point last semester where I would start writing stories and outlines for stories because I'd run out of interesting things to tell myself.  But now I'm talking to a whole new audience.

You know, I had a friend once who shared with me the fact that he secretly liked the cock.  And I'm not talking about chickens and roosters, either.  We haven't really spoken since I tipsy-texted him at IHOP after my first college party.  I think my best friend offended him a bit.  But he may have deserved it.  He's kind of been screwing me over relationship wise for a long time.

You see, dear readers, even though I know you don't much care for my romantic exploits, I'm going to tell you about this boy anway.  I have time and if you're still reading, so do you.  Anyway, this boy and I, we go back all the way to my freshman year of high--

Ehh...bit longer than that, actually, but freshman year of "high school" is kind of a good starting point.  Moving on.  Our churches got together during the summer for Vacation Bible School (hereby abreviated as VBS) and so we'd see each other regularly during those periods.  Finally in this, my freshman year of high school, we finally exchanged IM addresses.

We then started communicating quite frequently, for long periods of time.  Several hours we would have conversations, almost every night, even into the actual school year.  We told each other things we hadn't told anyone outside of the internet.  Like how he likes the cock and how I like reading slash fanfiction.  Admittedly, I gave mine away first, which is how he brought up the subject of his, but irrelevant.

So, he was potentially part-fay, but he still liked girls.  And I couldn't understand why he hadn't asked me out yet.  He was cute, I was almost there, he liked to talk to me, I liked to talk to him, it seemed like it would work.

Then he got a girlfriend.  And he still chatted with me very frequently.  Even to the point where we would, ah, "cyber" I believe is the term.  And then he broke up with his girlfriend, and I thought for sure he would ask me out then.  No, instead he got another girlfriend.  Same deal as last time.  And then he started dating my at-the-time-best friend.  And it looked pretty serious.  Realize, this is over a period of about two years or so.  He starts dating this friend of mine at the end of the semester right before he went off to college.

And I was just waiting for it to end like the others had, because it was the same. damn. deal. as all the other times.  We still chatted a lot, and we still would sext and cyber.  Mostly with me playing the male lead as he played the female lead, but again, irrelevant. 

And the relationship just kept going.

And going.

And going.  They never broke up.  I couldn't fathom it.  How could this one have lasted where all the others failed?  I was still the same, he was still the same.  The only difference was the girl.  And honestly, I think I know why she's different.  She's a little...ah...controlling and manipulative and I really don't know how I stayed friends with her for so long.  I figure he hasn't left because he doesn't know what she's really like since he's away at school out of state, even though they've been friends and have dated for a while.

When he left for college and they were still together, I figured it was the end of that, and I stopped initiating contact.

Soon after, he started texting and IMing again.  And so it continued for a year or so more.  And then, finally, I put my foot down one evening while with my best friend (who, in order to disperse confusion, I'm going to refer to as GL, okay?).  I was with her and I think we were playing a video game, or she was, or we were watching something on the tv?  I don't remember, but he (I'm going to name him something too, like DB or something :D  Actually, no I lie, that's someone else.  He can be...NT)  was texting and it was going the same way it always does if we text consistently for longer than an hour.  Down that road.  And I wasn't going to do it.  I felt bad for letting him do this to my once best friend, and I didn't like doing it if I wasn't going to ever see any payup for it.  If he wasn't going to ever date me (and at this point, it's definitely not looking good for that) then I didn't want any part in this.  So I said no.  And he kind of left it at that, but he definitely wasn't happy about it.

So a few weeks later, I went to my first college party.  It was a Grain party with the Tubas.  Supposedly it gets crazy, but we (meaning myself and GL, stands for Good Lady as in the title of Lady such-in-such) left before it could get insane.  So we went to IHOP for some food.  I initiated contact for the first time in two years.  I never text first, but that night I did.  And I wasn't completely sober, either.  And apparently GL had tried to send him a message on facebook and he'd ignored it because he says he didn't know who she was and why she was sending him a message.  She claimed it was bull and stole my phone to text him more.

He got kind of upset and I tried to diffuse the situation when I got my phone back.  But I was also kind of miffed at him because he was quite obviously lying to both of us, and he couldn't admit it.

I haven't heard from him since.

I guess maybe it was my fault for letting it happen.  I was just so sure that something would come of it, that when I realized it never would, I was stuck in a habit of going along with it.

I suppose we'll never hear the rest of the story between Captain Me and the wench NT.  But I think I'm okay with that, after all.

If you've stuck around this long, I give you a lot of credit.  I know I'm tedious and I have a tendency to ramble.  I know it's hard to understand where I'm going with a story, mostly because I don't know where I'm going when I start it.

But thanks for reading anyway.  I really do appreciate it.

If you say "TL;DR," that's cool.  Maybe one day I will have hilarious drawings to illustrate my stories and you will read them with a fervor you've never known before.

Or you'll just skip to the end and read the last bit.  That's cool too.

Until Next Time, Dear Reader,

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