Sunday, September 16, 2012

My Crappy Day Just Got Better

I shall tell this in chronological order, since you always do bad news first and end on the good note.

My day was actually pretty "crappy."  I'd go so far as to say "shitty."  You'll find out why this is punny soon.  (Remember?  I work in puns)

I didn't sleep so well last night.  The two dogs who live in my house kept me awake for a good portion of it due to whining and being lonely because their owners are out of town for a few days.  (Or at least, they were out last night, REGARDLESS), so I wake up, go to work, yaddayaddayadda.

I'm not awake during work.  I managed to be professional and none of the customers could tell, but I was just not all there.  I wasn't feeling terribly good, either, due to a headache that felt a whole heckuva lot like a sharp pencil stabbing into my brain on my left side.  That started at 5:30, switched briefly to the right side at around 8:45 and then went back for one or two more goes before the end of work.  Not so much fun, I tell you.  Either I got used to it, or it went away, but it didn't hurt QUITE as bad as before by the end of work.

And then it occurred to me, I had schoolwork left to do for class tomorrow.  And that bummed me out so bad, it wasn't even funny.  I was not a happy camper at the end of work.

And then I learned I don't even have to go in for the three hours I thought I had to tomorrow, which is both good and bad.  Bad because I need the hours, good because it gave me a few extra hours in the morning to be able to finish up what schoolwork I might not get done today.

So, leaning towards it being a good thing, I stopped on my way home and ordered a pizza for one from Domino's because, well, I felt like it, dangit.  That and I'm Sally from Coupling, so suck it. (if you don't know what Coupling is, it's a BBC sitcom from the early 2000s, that was a little like Friends, but British and if you haven't watched it, you really should.)

And then I got home, and my back hallway, where my room and the bathroom that's used mostly by me is located, smelled of dog crap.  Not exactly a great scent to come home to when you've smelt cheese pizza in the seat next to you for the past 20 minutes.  So I had to take care of that.  (See where my day gets crappy? Do you see it? Yeah, thought you might)

But then I ate my pizza, and I did my school work and lo-and-behold, I finished it, too!  It apparently was not as much as I thought in the beginning.  So I'll have free time tomorrow morning before class, which'll be great.

And then, a few hours ago, I noticed I just wasn't feeling so fantastic.  I was feeling nauseas, my tummy was really unhappy, and my head was starting to hurt again.  And I wasn't hungry (which is usually what those signs mean) because I've been eating on and off all afternoon like a little piggy.  So I couldn't figure it out.  And it wasn't like I'd had a lot to eat, I'd just been grazing every couple of hours or so, finishing off the pizza, snacking on some chips, little things.

So, on a whim, I decide I need to leave my room.  And as I step into the hall, this overwhelming smell of more dog-crap assaults my nasal passages.  And it's strong enough to make ME gag, which if you know me, that takes kind of a lot.  And I'm like "Dude, I got rid of the smell from earlier, W-T-F mate? Did it come back?"

And it occurs to me, suddenly, that I don't know when the last time the dogs had been out was.

So I warily turn on the lights as I peek around the corner, and it just gets worse.  It's like, really super duper bad now.  And I see the damage.

I will not recount to you the sight I beheld, since thinking about it makes my digestive system want to revolt.  But know that it was really bad.  Oh, and apparently the girl who is supposed to take care of them while their owners are out of town may or may not actually be coming by tonight.  I had no idea when she'd be here and there'd still be clean up and taking care of, ah, shit to do.  So I texted the doggies' mommy, and then I took matters into my own hands, cleaned up the dog, cleaned up the crate, set up the back-up crate (because ain't no WAY I was putting her back into the messy crate, even freshly cleaned, I am not that cruel), put a blanket in there, put her in there, took the other dog out because he was feeling left out, mopped the floor (none of this is in any particular order except that this is the order I'm remembering it, not the order it was done), febreezed EVERYTHING, and started the laundry.  Then I cleaned my shoes and my feet and went back into my room where it is safe.  I'm keeping an ear out for the dog-sitter girl for a few more hours and if she doesn't show by 11 (which is when I'm heading to bed, because screw it, I'm tired, I've been up since 4 and had to deal with all of this), I'll feed the dogs just a little bit and give them some water and take them out again, and then be on duty (oh my gosh the puns just make themselves, I swear! I didn't even try that time!) for in the morning before class.

I don't mind helping take care of these dogs, I really don't.  And this was an exceptional circumstance day.  They rarely poop in my bathroom anymore (especially after I started picking the bathmat up off the floor) and so it was quite surprising this afternoon to find that, and I think the doggy that had the issue was having tummy troubles, otherwise I think she would have held it.  So I don't blame them, their owners, or the girl who is supposed to be taking care of them.  These are extreme times, and everyone has a bad day, even doggies.

And then I got to come back to my computer.  Granted, I haven't been on the internet in, like, two days.  It's ridiculous.  I was JUST getting around to checking blogger, when I saw two posts from a new friend of mine, who, I must say, is just about the sweetest guy I think I've ever known.  No, seriously.  He wrote a blog post with a poem in it.  And he addressed me in it.  I cannot tell you how much that brightened up my day.  Even thinking about it I get this huge, goofy grin on my face.  And in order to let him know how much it meant to me, I wrote this blog post (which I'd been trying to mentally compose all day but I couldn't find a good enough subject).

I am not the best judge of character.  Actually, were I to rate myself 1-10 with 1 being the worst judge of character you can think of and 10 being Jesus Christ, I'd say I'm probably negative pi.  I don't even know if there IS negative pi.  But that's about where I'd be on the judge-of-character scale.  I'm only negative pi and not any farther because there are people in my life who I was a good judge of character with, but they are sooooooo few in the number of people I've met, it's averages out.

So when people go beyond my expectations (which are by no means high, and it certainly shouldn't happen as rarely as it does), it's just the most crazy thing in the world to me.  And to be praised for something I do simply as a character trait, when usually I don't get praised at all for anything, that's just...incredible.  Seriously.

No, really, you guys.  Best day ever, even if it started the way it did.  All because someone appreciated the fact that I care.  Someone actually noticed.  It's ridiculous.

So thank you, Chip.  I'd have written you a poem, but I'm absolute bollocks at poems.  Instead, a punny joke:

Why are the people in France so thin?  Because one egg is un oeuf.  Why don't they tell that joke in France?  Because un oeuf is un oeuf.

(Note, un oeuf is to be said kind of like enough)

Thank you, I'll be here all week.

Until next time, dear readers


  1. I got so deep into your "shit" that when you mentioned me I was like "Say what?", did a double take, and made this puzzled Scooby Doo sound in my head...all within a nanosecond. Two words to end this comment that you aren't allowed to forget...those two words: YOU MATTER!!!

    1. Lol, just imagined you doing a Scooby Doo impression :) Thanks, though. For serious, not for fake. This type of stuff doesn't happen much to me, to the point where, I very vaguely remember the last time something remotely similar happened. So thanks :)